1.) always thoroughly wash your hands and arms before and after each play session. Typically, a mild dish soap works very well before and after. If it’s available to you after a play session with a powder-based lubricant, add some Epsom Salt which will clump up the lube to help you wash it off easier. You want to at least wash up to your elbows. Of course, if you discuss with your partner that depth play is something they fancy, you should be cautious and wash up to your shoulders. (If in a group play setting, you should wash properly and thoroughly between each play partner).
2.) always make sure to do proper trimming/manicuring of your nails so that you do not cause potential internal or external bodily harm to your play partners. Nail files come in various forms such as metal, crystal, etc. As long as you file your finger/toe nails down to the finger/toe tip of the nailbed and round off any rough edges, you should be good to go. A good way of double-checking this is to rub your finger/toe nail edges inside the palms of your hands or the inside of your other finger tips to make sure you feel no rough nail edges that need more filing/smooth rounding.
3.) always check your hands for open sores, scratches, etc. If you have any actively healing wounds, it is best to treat them properly while also utilizing gloves. You want to make any play partner aware as well and make the decision together on how to best to safely proceed forward with the session.
4.) always use PLENTY OF LUBRICANT! There can never be “too much” lube and usually no bottom play partner will start a fuss because you used too much. However, be safe and make sure to ask what’s in the lubricant mix if you didn’t make it yourself. Most bottoms usually bring their own lube to the session, so you likely will not ever have to worry about bringing your own; but provide the same courtesy if you mix lube. We encourage you to monitor how much you’re using to keep playing very smooth and maintaining a good lube viscosity. You’ll often need to add more lube during a play session, which is totally normal and expected.
5.) never bottom-shame (to make a bottom receptive partner feel un-at ease, intentionally). Regardless of what happens, try to always practice the best sensitivity you can around unexpected situations. For example, if a bottom prepared for play and still was not cleaned out during a play session, just let them know (without making any awkward facial expressions or demeaning negative comments) and if possible, allow them the opportunity to go and prepare more. If this happens in a public play environment, do the bottom a favor and just whisper in his ear that he may need to prepare more and try to clean him up as discreetly as possibly to try not to draw attention (your partner will totally love you for this). Another example is urine; during any type of play session, it is common that the prostate/bladder may be stimulated and cause urination. Acknowledge it has happened and if you need to, communicate with your play partners about rather to continue or if they would like to clean-up a bit first. Unexpected things happen during a play session and communication is key.
6.) listen to your bottom partners’ suggestions during play. It may be difficult sometimes but try to take critiques in your technique as positive criticism from your bottom to help make the play session much more enjoyable for your both. After all, if they want to continue, says more about their commitment to the session than the session ending, right?
7.) remember to pace yourself, it’s not about where you’re going but the quality of the experience along the way. Always go slow and feel your way around your bottoms’ anus first before advancing your technique. You can do this by inserting 1 finger and more additionally while monitoring your bottoms’ reactions to what you’re doing. Yeah, you may have possibly seen them take 2 fists before or maybe taken them from another play partner just before you. However, this will help to get you both acclimated to the new play session with one another before advancing forward. If your bottoms authorizes for you to advance forward in some other capacity, by all means, accommodate them if possible.
8.) always practice good care of your bottom(s) during, and after a play session. This can be done by:
- a.) every so often, asking how they are feeling.
- b.) offering them some water.
- c.) offering to change out a used puppy pad for a new clean one or clean up excess lube from the play area that the bottom is laying in.
- d.) using paper towels or towels to clean their butt off during a break or after a session, removing excess lubricant and bodily fluid (best to be done most safely with proper hand protection such as gloves). Let’s face it, bottoms typically go through much to prepare for you both to have an enjoyable session and these common courtesies can go a long way.